[Wonderful Labs] The Drowsiest of Wonderful

[Wonderful Laboratories]

********** That condor-coated cloud they call the Sandman/ triptraps on
my bridge most every night... Mister Wonderful here, with a big bag full
of shuteye and an aim to use it someday soon.  But first we have more
wickedness to complete and conventional things to contemplate, so please
enjoy these tasty pillows of yore... 

-------- Original Message --------
Subject: SLEEPYTIME WONDER
Date: Thu, 06 May 1999 


Dear Mister Wonderful, 

	A friend of mine wants to know and I thought you might have some
insight.  

	How come we yawn? Why is it contagious? And is it interspecial? And if
it is, does it go both ways or is it only humans that are powerless
against the suggestion of a yawn (even if it was their pet dog that
started it)?

-up too late in the Boondocks
________________
Dear Man named Jed,

	We yawn because ghosts are continually trying to take over our bodies
and regain the glorious world of sensation.  They reach their ethereal
hands through our skulls and massage the back of the throat until we
open our mouths, then they attempt to "jump in".  This rarely works.  So
they move on to the next poor fool in the room, which is why yawns seem
contagious:  if at first the dead buggers don't succeed, they try, try again.

	Ghosts are desperate, as well as stupid.  This accounts for their
occasional assaults on the animal kingdom.  Oh, and we're more
susceptible to their predation when tired.  I forgot that bit.

	So the next time you feel a yawn coming on, just shout "Fuck off,
Princess Di!" really loud.  That should do the trick, especially if
you're on a crowded bus.


**********************
IN EXCELSIS WONDERFUL
**********************

-- 
Hot Handed God Of Cops

	"Besides, with Fellini gone, a place where you see 
	Lorenzo Mattotti next to Klingons next to Bill Griffith 
	next to Peter Mayhew next to a hooker is the 
	greatest show on earth."

	-Tom Spurgeon on Comic Conventions,
	in "The Comics Journal"