[Wonderful Labs] LATE AGAIN WITH WONDER

[Wonderful Labs]

Dear Wonderful,

	My family and friends keep pressuring my significant other to "get
serious" and propose.  I think that we're already plenty serious, and
have told these well-meaning souls so.

	They haven't quit.

	Any suggestions?  I'd also appreciate any information from Messrs. Dark
and Malice on how to get bloodstains out of the carpet, if that's the
direction you're going to take.

-Wit's End
______________
Dear Marion Kind,

	You know what else is serious?  A heart attack.  And while one supposes
that a marriage proposal is a *form* of heart attack (a full-frontal
assault on the mighty castle wall of the beloved's solitary emotions), I
think perhaps we need to rethink at least one of these idioms.

	The fact is, most couples don't get "serious" - they get "delusional." 
And we all know what happens when you're delusional - you get
"committed."  

	Look - I didn't invent the language.  I just use it to make with the ha-has.

	Mister Wonderful thinks you should tell your family this:  APE LAW!  

	Your partner is an orangutan from the future, shaved for espionage. 
There can be no marriage between the species.  Only hot monkey sex. 
Surely your loved ones will understand.

	Not to be a party pooper, but I don't think you'll get many rug
cleaning tips from Dark and Malice.  I think they just cut away the
stained section and use it to wrap up the body until the whole package
can be dumped into a merrily burning orphanage.


******************
WONDERFUL LABS - If You're Going To Be Up All Night Anyway, You Might As
Well Think About Weird Shit
******************

Mister Wonderful Recommends:  No!  Time to lose.  

http://www.foxfullerton.org/

-- 
Honey Why

	"Oh Lili, Lili, Lili, legs, Lili, Lili..." 

	-Hedley Lamarr (Harvey Korman),
	waxing poetic over the Academy Award nominated
	Madeline Kahn (Best Supporting Actress, no bullshit),
	"Blazing Saddles" (1974)


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