[Wonderful Labs] SIT ON MY WONDER

[Wonderful Labs]

Dear Mr. W,

	Are laptop computers truly laptops if no one (at least no one I know)
places them on their laps while in use?

Signed,
Steve Jobs
______________
Dear Thigh Master,

	You know, they still call it a "lap dance" even though I understand it
is rare that the person sitting actually does the dancing.

	Still, it can hardly be as much fun to have 4 pounds of super-heated
silicon (as opposed to silicone (as opposed to Silly Putty)) in your
lap, ever.  They *were* going to give the portable units a more accurate
name, but apparently "Crotchfire" didn't test well with the focus
groups.  Folks didn't readily associate the name with a type of
computer; they thought it referred to a Christian heavy metal band or a
topical ointment.

	Your modern digital snake oil advertisement refers to "notebook"
computers, which is, of course, another misnomer - they rarely perform
well after you gouge the Van Halen logo into their cover with a
ball-point pen or rip out their parts to make illicit airplanes.


***************
WONDERFUL LABS - The Secret Of Alchemy: Stroke A Wand Until It Becomes A Ruler
***************

Mister Wonderful Recommends:  The sweetest transvestite.

http://www.rockymusic.org/sounds/rhps.html

-- 
And the Revolver cries Mary

	"In my trade, to be spoken well of
	 can be professionally disastrous."

		- Gregory Corso (Johnny Depp),
		"The Ninth Gate"

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