[Wonderful Labs] THE SACRIFICIAL WONDER

[Wonderful Labs]

Dear Mister Wonderful,

	Why do arsonists set fires? What are their Motivations?

Signed, 
#@($@^%*##$@!!
__________________
Dear Smokey the $%&#@*,

	It is a mistake to think that all arsonists are batshit evil.  Many are
in the grip of forces beyond their control, and some lost their control
of forces in their grip.  Some are also dumbfucks who should sent to the Gulags.

	Did you know that firemen have coined a phrase, "The Rabbit Effect,"
for a particularly gruesome and hilarious (in that "you shouldn't be
laughing, but that's part of what makes it so funny, god, I'm a terrible
person hee hee hee" way) woodland conflagration phenomena?  Let's just
say that it isn't always the wind that brings flame from one area of the
forest to another.

	My point is that California is being punished by the gods for allowing
Hercules to become their Governor.  Hercules offended Hera, is a great
disappointment to Zeus, has defied the Titans, and owes Hermes fifty
bucks.  Thusly, hence, and as usual, those whom the gods would destroy,
they first get some pissant to light a fire in the woods nearby.

	If Hercules had just stayed in New York and kept his head down, this
wouldn't be happening.  Now we've got Olympic-sized assholes running
around with cans of gasoline and theocratic voices in their head singing
Jim Morrison songs.  Thanks a bunch, El Herco.

	Some arsonists, of course, do it for the money.  But Money is just as
much a god as any other, even though he changes his name every couple of
centuries.  Mister Wonderful would like to remind you of General Rule
For The Betterment Of Humanity #289: Never trust a god you didn't invent.


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WONDERFUL LABS - Our Particles Are Super Rad
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Mister Wonderful Recommends: 50,000+ words worth of pictures explaining
the divine madness that is "EVIL DEAD: The Musical" <-- which is, in
itself, four words that are worth their weight in platinum.  If there is
to be peace on earth, Broadway will one day be Deadway.

http://www.cipolla.ca/beyondchutleigh/evildeadthemusical/images.htm

-- 
Der Hexer

	"We're rascals, scoundrels, 
	villains and knaves
	Drink up me hearties, yo ho
	We're devils and black sheep
	Really bad eggs
	Drink up me hearties, yo ho"

		- Xavier Antencio,
		"Yo Ho! (A Pirate's Life for Me)"

See London!  See France!
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