[Wonderful Labs] The Taste of Smoke and Wonder

[Wonderful Labs]

Dearest Readers,

	GREETINGS FROM GREEN-EYED POTRZEBIE!

	So it turns out that someone's replaced the deadly black coffee I
normally drink while typing up these little missives with Dilithium
Crystals.  *Dilithium Crystals -  The Favorite Drug of Manic-Depressive
Trekkies Since 1967.*  I do apologize for any undue incoherence that may
have resulted.  

	You know, it's really not a bad tasting little chemical stimulant - the
only drawback so far is having to buy a new hat to fit over the warp
nacelles that seem to be growing out of my brain stem.

	As to the issue of who's been tampering with my potables, well, Mister
Malice blames Mister Monkey.  He says we should take him back to the
Labs, toss him into the teleporter with a dog and see if we can make a
"chimphuahua."  This, of course, means that Mister Malice is actually
the fiend responsible, but the question remains as to why he wishes to
cause a rift between me and my monkey.  What has he got to hide?

	In any case, wisdom wanters, here is a query I found while browsing
through the 8th circle of the Main Library of Potrzebie.  I discovered
it tucked into the 11th volume of Hotspur's "Passions of the
Potrzebians."  Addressed to myself, it is written on foolscap, and in lipstick:

>Dear Pontificator,
>Why does Chinese lit have a history of amiable 
>drunken poets, while English-language poetry seems 
>stuck with the stuffy, surly drunks?
>Thanks,
>Lao Tzu
________________
Dear Boom-Boom Xin Gu,

	What?  Charles Bukowski's not your tub of fun?

	In China, alcohol has long been regarded a sacred drink, approved by
the gods.  It's a necessary component of ritual, not to mention that
cool thing Jackie Chan does when he flips the bottle in the air, punches
the guy, then catches the bottle and takes a swig.  Plus, Chow Yun Fat
makes  good use of a Budweiser can in John Woo's "The Killer."  Ask
yourself: Did Ezra Pound ever shoot his way out of a church?  Yes, of
course.  But he could have just given them the baby back.

	Hurm.  There still seems to be a bit of "fun juice" in my system.  Let
us attempt to be brief:

	The Chinese are historically much groovier when it comes to altered
states of consciousness and going with the flow and digging the physical
body and all that.  Westerners have a pathological need to be *in
control*.  Unfortunately, when you're a poet your head moves into all
sorts of unexpected spaces, drunk or no.  Therefore, most surly English
poets are just wracked with societally contracted self-loathing, whether
they realize it or not.

	A similar argument may be used to explain why European porn stars are
so much more fun to watch than Americans.

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-- 
Do I have to Goo Goo Muck it out?

	"You're a mental lunatic, you are.  Take
	your damnable blasphemies and your vile
	pseudo-philosophy and your garters
	and get out of my head, damn you!"

		- Robert Anton Wilson,
		"Masks of the Illuminati"

Pay attention there will be a quizzical look
http://www.wonderfullabs.com/tempe.html
http://www.livejournal.com/~ideaspace
http://www.cafeshops.com/apotheosis