Begone Zhedong!

[IgorLoving]

I bought this cool Russian watch with a KGB logo on it. It ran for 12 hours=
 then ran backwards for a half hour and then stopped. Pretty cool watch. No=
w I am studying the 30 meter wind patterns over South Texas which is much m=
ore interesting.


-----Original Message-----
From: TeleBob <telebob@sbcglobal.net>
Sent: May 19, 2004 8:45 AM
To: austin-ghetto-list@pairlist.net
Subject: Re: Begone Zhedong!

Nice one Wayne.  I am studying my LaoTzu, Mao, Marx,and Li Yu in order to s=
teal/compose my Mao poem on the everturning dialectic that  will leave us i=
n the driver's seat next time history makes another leap forward.  Don{t co=
unt me out in the running for that watch....
=20
tele hao hao

Bill Irwin <billi@aloha.net> wrote:
Wayne;
What a wonderful historical study of the life of Chairman Mao.  I never kne=
w that he was a mid-westerner - that explains a lot!  You are a scholar and=
 a gentleman ( I guess ).  Your essay could be the winner or at least a run=
ner-up, congratulations.
Aloha,
Ewie
----- Original Message -----=20
From: Wayne Johnson=20
Subject: Begone Zhedong!


The Life and Times of Mao Zhedong.

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Most Chinese and Western histories record little Mao=92s birth as being som=
ewhere in Hunan Province on Boxing Day, 1893.  Actually, he was born in Tol=
edo, Ohio on March 12, 1894 to Moira and Cassius Breckenridge in the back o=
f the Hotel Demimonde between Acts 2 & 3 of The Chinaman=92s Curse, a Melod=
rama written by Moira=92s second Uncle Vaysha while serving time in a Lithu=
anian prison for child empersonation.  He had started out to re-write Ivanh=
oe but fell asleep one night over a bowl of Borsht Chow Mein and decided in=
stead to write a parable about capitalism, Marx and phrenology. =20

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Shortly after Mao=92s birth, he and his parents moved to Shanghai to avoid =
prosecution by Ohio police for shoplifting.  The mad dash across the Great =
Plains in the middle of the summer was always considered a seminal event fo=
r Mao and one which he used to great advantage when he first began teaching=
 diesel mechanics in night school.  His great spiritual mentor was, of cour=
se, the noted Darwinist and converted Quaker, Dr. Moon Yet Sin, in Changsha=
, capital of Hunan.  When Dr. Moon led a peaceful protest in 1911 protestin=
g the rice tax and the war against Japan, the local police beat him and his=
 fourteen lady consorts severely about the head and shoulders.  Mao left Dr=
. Moon for another province and began the serious study of John Nathan Mill=
, Herbert DeLong Spencer, and Camille Rousseau but was handicapped by lack =
of money and began a series of daring midnight raids against local porno ho=
uses and opium dens.  Soon he was known as Master Mao, Kingpoon of Tang pro=
vince. =20

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His short life as a bandit hero among the local peasants was interrupted fi=
rst by moving to Peking, disguised as a duck and later by World War II and =
the coming of General MacArthur, General Tojo and General Mills of Madison,=
 Wisconsin.   It was reading the entire Communist Manifesto on the back of =
a Wheaties box that caused him the form the first truly communist cell in P=
eking: The Pink Duck Gang.  The PDG, as it was known, secretly plotted to w=
ith other student to make May 5, 1919 a day of national protest against Jap=
anese concessions.  Unhappily, the PDG overslept and the uprising took plac=
e without them the previous day, May 4.  Undaunted, Mao decided to make his=
 ideas known to more people, Mao had a local printer run off four and a hal=
f million copies of his Little Pink Book.  Because of previous commitments =
to a local movie theater, the printer ran out of white ink and the last fou=
r and a quarter million copies came out bright red.  The rest, as they say,=
 is history. =20

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Embaressed by this faux pas, Mao and his follower=92s, Bart, Grimaldi, Juan=
 and Yang, fled to XianShiang province to live out their lives in peace.  B=
ut they were not allowed to do so, as unknown to many, Cecil B. deMille was=
 planning to make a great extrava

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